Effective Written Communication: Useless Words and Phrases

By Irene Watson

Every writer needs a good editor, whether it's another person or an internal editor who can adequately judge, cut, and rewrite sentences. Yes, an editor will check for grammar and punctuation problems, but a good editor will also trim down text to make it shorter and more readable. Authors, however, who want to be good writers, should not depend solely on an editor; they should also strive to hone their own writing skills and create the most effective and to-the-point sentences possible. Revision is all important because it's the process through which wordiness can be changed into effective communication.

When writing a first draft, the important thing is simply to get everything you want to say down on the page, no matter how badly written it might end up being. But once that first draft is written, revision is required. A good author will realize that revision includes cutting, trimming, and manicuring the sentences so they are as neat and precise as possible. Just like a gardener, a writer realizes it is not enough to have a bunch of words (flowers), but that those words need to be neat and orderly and not so profuse that the meaning (the best flowers in the garden) are not noticed amid a bunch of words (weeds). Every word should count and extraneous words should be deleted.

Whether you are writing a paragraph, an article, a short story, or a novel, a good rule of thumb is to aim to cut down 10 percent from the first to the second draft. If you write a novel of 80,000 words with your rough draft, your revision may well end up being 72,000 words after you trim down every little word and phrase you don't need. That doesn't mean you shouldn't consider the need to develop your writing and add details or examples to back up your points, but you should also look to eliminate wordy phrases and places where you tend to repeat yourself.

I have many friends who have taught writing over the years, and I've heard their war stories about the writing mistakes their students make. One difficulty students usually have is to fill the space required to write a four-page essay or whatever the teacher assigns them. And when the students do fill that space, they often do so with extraneous words that say nothing. I have often thought an effective way to teach writing would be to have a student assigned to write a 2,000 word essay and then actually count the words and make the student adhere exactly to that word count-not 1,967 words, not 2,038, but exactly 2,000 words. The student would then revise until every word counted.

In the movie "A River Runs Through It" there's a great scene where the father teaches his son how to write. The son brings his essay to his father, and the father crosses out passages and then tells him to redo it-and make it half as long. Learning how to say something in 2,000 words and then to say the same thing in 1,000 words, or even 50 words is something authors must constantly do when writing and talking about their books. Such practices are effective exercises. Whatever piece of writing you are working on, I challenge you to cut it by 10 percent, and then 50 percent, to see whether you can hone down its language to the most necessary words.

Following are some words and phrases I frequently see overused or that are completely unnecessary. I'll also give you a couple of examples of big words that can be replaced with smaller ones. Just as two or three words can be replaced with one, it's equally important to take the three syllable word and replace it with the one syllable word whenever possible.

I Remember

I often see sentences that begin with phrases like:

I remember one time when I was in sixth grade....

If you lived the experience you are telling us about, it's obvious that you remember it. It's implied that it's one of your memories. It's sufficient just to say:

When I was in sixth grade....

One Time a Friend of Mine

You'll notice in the rewrite above that I also deleted "one time." Let's look at another sentence using that phrase:

One time a friend of mine taught me how to fish.

It's perfectly fine just to say:

A friend taught me how to fish.

Notice also that I changed "a friend of mine" to "a friend." Unless the person is someone else's friend, like "my grandpa's friend" or "Joe's friend," it's implied that the person is your friend.

The Fact

Use of "the fact" is hardly ever necessary. For example, you could easily eliminate it in the following sentence:

I cannot change the fact that he does not like me.

Often, "the fact" is part of "due to the fact that" which is even more unnecessary. A good substitute for this wordy phrase is "because." Why use five words where one will do? Here's an example:

She put on suntan lotion due to the fact that it was a hot and sunny day.
She put on suntan lotion because it was a hot and sunny day.

Here's another:

Janet called to complain due to the fact that her billing was in complete disarray.

What a mess of a sentence! Why not just say:

Janet called because her billing is a mess.

There Are

Whenever possible, it's advisable to avoid starting sentences with "There are." Here's an example and its rewrite:

There are some researchers who believe that some cats don't like to eat mice.
Some researchers believe cats don't like to eat mice.

The sentence's real subject is "researchers" and "believe" is the verb so put them at the beginning of the sentence where they belong so the sentence is stronger.

Here's another example:

There are many reasons why you should visit the doctor regularly.
Many reasons exist for why you should visit the doctor regularly.

The original sentence isn't that bad, but "exist" as the verb allows the sentence's subject to be at the sentence's beginning where it rightfully belongs.

In Life (and other obvious places)

Here are some "in" phrases that really irritate me:

• In life
• In the world
• In the world today
• In today's society

Unless you're writing about "in death," it's implied you're talking about life. Unless you're talking about what happens on other planets, it's implied it's in the world, and unless you're comparing the present to the past, it's implied it's today. Here are a few examples of when these phrases are used and how to reword them:

• In life, we must always strive to do our best. Obviously, we strive in life since we can't strive in death, so just delete "In life" completely.
• In the world today, our natural resources are becoming depleted. In this case, you can just say "Today, our natural resources are becoming depleted." Or better, "Our natural resources are being depleted."
• In today's society, girls are not afraid to show their belly-buttons. Again, here "Today" may be all you need at the beginning of the sentence, or you could say, "Girls are no longer afraid to show their belly-buttons." The "no longer" implies that the present is different than the past.

Big vs. Small Words

Never use a big word where a small word will do. People who tend to use big words usually do so because they are trying to impress someone, and big words used to impress are often misused by people who don't really know how to use them anyway. Even when using such words properly, trying to impress someone should never take the place of communicating with that person. Here's a perfect example. I once went to a conference where the speaker presented a paper about a classic novel, and the speaker kept going on and on about the main character's interior perceptions versus her exterior perceptions. What the speaker was really talking about was the difference between what the character saw and how she felt. A lot less impressive sounding, but a lot easier to understand.

I'm not the first person to complain about the word "utilize" or "utilization." I have yet to find a time when "use" and "usage" don't work just as well. Just as you should aim to shorten two or three words down to one that means the same thing, so you should aim to use a one syllable word rather than a three syllable one.

Writing dialogue tags are another perfect example. If an author writes effective dialogue, readers do not need to be told how the words were said with a tag like "Joe expressed adamantly." The words Joe says should be enough to show that they were said adamantly. It is sufficient after what Joe says, simply to say, "Joe said." If you use any words other than "said, replied, asked" for a dialogue tag, you're being wordy. There's no need for "questioned, queried, wondered, responded, retaliated, reiterated, exclaimed, suggested, proclaimed, declared, chortled, snorted" etc. Stick with "said" and rewrite what was said so Joe's meaning is there in the tone of how he says the words.

Finding the right word takes skill, but every word counts. Find the words that make the point as quickly as possible before you lose the reader in a flood of unnecessary words that fail to communicate. Big words and wordiness are the bane of communication and they don't impress anyone.

Irene Watson is the Managing Editor of Reader Views, where avid readers can find reviews of recently published books as well as read interviews with authors. Her team also provides author publicity and a variety of other services specific to writing and publishing books.

Uninterested and Disinterested - One Word is Cannibalising the Other

By John James Carty

Teachers of English often point out the dangers of losing a good word from the language. For the last fifty years 'disinterested' has been abused and battered. Now it provides a meaning it was not meant to have while killing another word that already gave us the required meaning.

'Disinterested' has suffered this conversion because its cousin, 'uninterested', which should be equally useful and popular has been left out in the cold, unused and unable to do its proper job.

'Uninterested', is and should remain the opposite of 'interested' as in, 'he is not interested in his work,' 'she is not interested in her studies.'

It has become common to use 'disinterested' for this meaning. It´s wrong, of course, but even the best dictionaries and their experts concede that if the wrong thing is said often enough - at least in English - it will eventually become correct.

Fashion is as powerful in the English language as it is in areas like dress or music. Who wears a girdle or a waistcoat nowadays? Who listens to Al Johnson or Rudy Valee? For some reason, people like saying 'disinterested' and don´t know, or don´t like 'uninterested'

'Disinterested' means 'not having an interest in'. Perhaps it´s not surprising that it´s losing this correct meaning because the phrase 'to have an interest in' is also a bit out of fashion. One famous English law case of the last century was lost by the defendant (claiming in negligence because his property burnt down) because, as the judge noted, 'the defendant coolly adverted to his interest in the insurance office'. That is, he wasn't worried about the fire because he had insurance cover. We wouldn't talk about 'an interest' in that way now, although it's correct.

We have 'an interest in' something in this sense when, for example, we have shares in a company or a relative of ours is concerned in a particular project. Such an 'interest' might affect the decisions we make and that is why lawmakers, judges etc have to 'declare an interest' in matters they are dealing with.

So 'disinterested' simply means 'impartial', which is a positive, desirable thing; it does not mean that we are bored with the subject or lack interest - we might be keenly interested in a matter yet still be 'disinterested'. This word is necessary but we're losing it.

We really need to maintain both words with their proper meaning; 'uninterested' usually has a negative meaning, with a suggestion that the person should be interested, while being 'impartial' is generally positive and necessary.

It´s probably too late already, but if 'disinterested' only has it´s wrong meaning, what other word do we use for 'impartial'?

The free website [http://www.english-free123.com] teaches English as a foreign language (TOEFL) and as a second language (TESL).The English exercises are all originally written material. The site also provides opinions and ideas for teachers.

The author and publisher of [http://www.english-free123.com], John James Carty, is a retired lawyer and senior civil servant. He graduated LLB from London University (1972) and took the British National Training Certificate in 1995. He is a former editor of the snooker magazines Baulkline and Cue World. He now lives in Colombia, South America, where he teaches English.

More Effective Business Communication - Six Tips

The Internet has made it both easier and more difficult for people to communicate. It is now easier than ever to send written correspondence; all it takes is the click of a button. But many people would rather send off a quick email than pick up the phone, which means more people than ever are putting even their quick, casual business communication in writing. If writing is not your strong point, you may not be communicating with coworkers, clients, and partners as effectively as you could be. Here are six tips to make your business communication skills better.

Never hit the send button right after writing. Even if you are not writing an emotionally charged email, hitting send too fast can hurt you. You might have sounded a little more harsh than you meant to, or you might not have written as clearly as you could have. Either way, give it an hour or two and come back to it with fresh eyes before sending. Often you are too close to the material just after you have written it to spot flaws in your communication.

Tone it down. You may not mean to come off harshly, but people are always taking your emails and memos the wrong way. If this happens to you, you may not realize how harsh you sound in your writing. Sometimes when people read something negative, it blocks them from absorbing your entire message. Before sending out your email, read it over carefully to make sure your message is not too negative.

Write in Microsoft Word first. Microsoft Word has the Spell Check feature, and your email probably does not. The feature does not catch every mistake, but it may help you spot some typos that you otherwise would have missed. If you have difficulty with spelling, write your communications in Microsoft Word first to take advantage of its Spell Check feature.

Break it up. People have difficulty absorbing long unbroken blocks of text. To make your emails and other communications more reader-friendly, break them up into shorter paragraphs, each containing a single main idea. This will make it easier for readers to understand your point.

Don't be too casual. The Internet has given rise to a lot of casual acronyms and shortenings of words, such as ur for your and u for you. Avoid these at all costs in business communications. They are too casual for a business environment.

Consider your audience. Are you writing to a marketing exec, a programmer or other technical employee, or the company president? Are you writing to one specific person or to a large audience with different levels of technical understanding? You should always tailor your communications to your audience. If you are writing to employees who are not technical, avoid specialized technical words and break concepts down so that laypeople can understand.

Every email and communication you send does not have to be a work of genius. But it does need to be easily understood. Use these tips, and your business communication is sure to improve.

Jennifer Williamson runs a successful business as an article writer and freelance writer in southern Pennsylvania. Visit her website for copywriting services that can help you boost sales and traffic online, or her freelance writing blog for up-to-the-minute writing advice.

Clauses: Noun, Adjectival And Adverbial Clauses

This is a group of words that is grammatically arranged that contains a subject and predicate. It could as well be defined as a sequence of words arranged grammatically and which have in it the subject and the verb. The important points are that it -

• is a well arranged group of words that are grammatically meaningful
• must have a subject
• must have a verb

The two (2) most important type of clauses are:

1. THE INDEPENDENT/MAIN
2. THE DEPENDENT/SUBORDINATE

Examples include:

Independent dependent

• We found out / that the roof leaks

An independent clause (or main) is one that can stand alone as a complete sentence. It may be part of a larger sentence, but if it is removed from the sentence, it still forms a complete sentence by itself. For example -

• After we bought the house, we found a crack in it.

The underlined sentence is an independent clause. It is not begin with a subordinator, relative pronoun or a relative adverb. So, a dependent/subordinate one normally begins with a subordinator, relative pronoun or relative adverb and cannot stand alone as a complete sentence. Such a clause must be connected to or included in an independent/main clause to complete it.

dependent independent

• When the referee blew the whistle, / the match stopped.

A dependent/subordinate clause performs the same function as a noun, adjective or adverb.

TYPES OF DEPENDENT OR SUBORDINATE CLAUSES

There are three (3) main types of clauses and they are:

1. NOUN
2. ADJECTIVAL
3. ADVERBIAL

NOUN CLAUSE

It performs the function of a noun. It fills the position or positions that a noun or nouns may fill in a sentence. A noun phrase is typically introduced by that, who, what, whom, whoever, whichever, whether, where, when, why and how.

Examples:

Note: SVOCA (Subject, Verb, Object, Complement and Adjunct)

1. The insult greatly pained him (S,A,V,O)

This can be reproduced as in the sentence below -

That Tina insulted him greatly pained him

• It is a noun clause (NC)
• It functions as the subject of the sentence

2. The cook gave us food. (S,V, Independent Object, dependent object)

This can be reproduced as in the sentence below -

The cook gave us what to eat.

• It is a NC
• It functions as the object of the sentence

3. Honesty is what we want. (as subject complement in the sentence)

4. We call him what he like. (as object complement)

ADJECTIVAL CLAUSE

It modifies or describes a noun, pronoun or other groups of words serving as noun. An adjectival clause usually follows the words that he modifies and it is typically introduced by relative pronouns and relative adverbs.

Examples:

1. The lady whose car was stolen is here

• It is an adjectival clause (AC)
• It modifies the noun 'lady'.

2. This is the house where I live.

• It is an AC
• It modifies the noun 'house'.

3. Can you think of any good reason why I should go to class?

• It is an AC
• It modifies the noun 'reason'.

ADVERBIAL CLAUSE

It modifies a verb or an adjective. It is usually introduced by relative adverbs or subordinating conjunction like unless, because, as if, in case, until, before, although, in as much as, etc. Several kinds are recognized. Adverbial clause could be of time, place, manner, reason, purpose, condition, concession and comparison.

1. Simi hissed when she saw Joy (of time, modifies the verb hissed)
2. Mike left his book where it can be seen (of place, modifies the verb left)
3. She ran as if she had a lion chasing her (of manner, modifies the verb ran)
4. He apologized because he knew he was wrong (adverbial clause of reason, modifies the verb apologized)
5. She trained so that she might win (of purpose, modifies the verb trained)
6. You will fail if you are idle (of condition, modifies the verb fail)
7. Although, he is poor, he is honest (of concession, modifies the verb is)
8. He is not as old as I thought (of comparison, modifies the verb is)